| ITEM | WHY DO YOU NEED THIS? |
|---|---|
| Flashlight | The power grid will CRASH. Don't be a loser in the dark! |
| Canned Food | Grocery stores can't scan items. Buy beans and spam now! Phat supply is key. |
| Bottled Water | Digital pumps might stop. Stay fresh with 50 gallons of water! |
| Hard Cash | ATMs are gonna die. Keep your greenbacks in your pocket! Whatever, just be ready. |
| Paper Maps | If GPS fails, you'll be lost forever. Learn to read a real map! |
| Battery Radio | The only way to hear the truth when the TV goes static. Talk to the hand, glitch! |
Revised: May 1999